Any tips dealing with GFs?

[Guest]

Yeah that's a weird age gap

[OP Here]

(04-16-2021, 07:01 AM)Focus Wrote: Dating someone in a very different phase of their life is tough for anyone, particularly for a neurosurgeon. Unless you have no academic ambitions or live together, you will find your time very constrained.

Most important thing is communication. Very easy to let that slip but even just day to day texts etc are important. Also important to communcate up front your difficult schedule, likelihood of canceling etc.

Thank you for this advice. We have been together for a few years, while I was in med school, so we have been through a busy time.

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(04-16-2021, 10:50 AM)Guest Wrote: This will be tough given her age.. at 18 I assume she'll be starting college. Remember how new everything was, meeting people, parties, etc. She will want to explore these things most likely and, in conjunction with your absence, you'll both likely drift apart while she meets someone else who's more available, throws fun parties, part of the same club/major, etc. Very likely she'll grow to resent your workload and eventually you as well. Again all of this is compounded by her age and limited dating experience/maturity. You can have a sit down and conversation, and likely she'll agree and says she'll understand but in reality no one understands what's coming not even you. You're both in very different places in your lives.

Even if you date a more mature 26+ year old working professional, it's still hard because no matter what your hours will always be worse. You're always tied to your pager. The 26yo is likely to be more understanding and look to the longterm future (starting family, etc) depending on how serious you guys are. You think being married would be more "secure," but not really as divorces occur not infrequently even those who get married in residency with full "understanding" of the workload. I'm not aware of your current situation, however. This may sound all doom and gloom but just providing a realistic perspective based on what I've personally observed time and time again. Takes 2 to tango. Don't be surprised if things don't go the way you want.

Thank for this this helpful advice. We've been together for a few years, though the clinical years of medical school and while I did aways, so I beleive we both understand. Of course, as you mentioned, things can head south and we both must have to accecpt that. I guess we will just wait and see. 

I guess I am quite a bit older so that is an issue. Should have probably gone into derm or opto. 

You are right about divorce. Divorce is really dangerous in the USA, where the fe-male will take over 50% of your wealth and over 50% of your future income in perpetuity.

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(04-16-2021, 02:10 PM)Guest Wrote:

(04-16-2021, 12:24 PM)Guest Wrote: Apparently no one thinks dating a high school senior as a resident is weird. Interesting

100% agree with you.

OP better have a good justification. I can't think of one.

I don't have to justify anything. She is in college and we've know each other for several years now.

[Guest]

Lol. I refuse to believe this is real. No way this guy both admitted to dating a 16 year old while he was in medical school and decided neurosurgeryhub.org was the best place to ask for advice.

[Guest]

(04-16-2021, 07:58 PM)Guest Wrote: Lol. I refuse to believe this is real. No way this guy both admitted to dating a 16 year old while he was in medical school and decided neurosurgeryhub.org was the best place to ask for advice.

agree lmao. this is ridiculous. added on to the fact that it took way too many replies to the OP for someone to bring up that this is not a normal dating situation

[Guest]

(04-16-2021, 07:58 PM)Guest Wrote: Lol. I refuse to believe this is real. No way this guy both admitted to dating a 16 year old while he was in medical school and decided neurosurgeryhub.org was the best place to ask for advice.

16 is age of consent in many states. Do you prefer to date females who slept with 100s of men?

[Guest]

(04-16-2021, 07:58 PM)Guest Wrote: Lol. I refuse to believe this is real. No way this guy both admitted to dating a 16 year old while he was in medical school and decided neurosurgeryhub.org was the best place to ask for advice.

lol.

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(04-16-2021, 09:32 PM)Guest Wrote:

(04-16-2021, 07:58 PM)Guest Wrote: Lol. I refuse to believe this is real. No way this guy both admitted to dating a 16 year old while he was in medical school and decided neurosurgeryhub.org was the best place to ask for advice.

16 is age of consent in many states. Do you prefer to date females who slept with 100s of men?

wow you're assuming a lot about a lot ....

[Guest]

(04-16-2021, 09:53 PM)Guest Wrote:

(04-16-2021, 07:58 PM)Guest Wrote: Lol. I refuse to believe this is real. No way this guy both admitted to dating a 16 year old while he was in medical school and decided neurosurgeryhub.org was the best place to ask for advice.

lol.

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(04-16-2021, 09:32 PM)Guest Wrote:

(04-16-2021, 07:58 PM)Guest Wrote: Lol. I refuse to believe this is real. No way this guy both admitted to dating a 16 year old while he was in medical school and decided neurosurgeryhub.org was the best place to ask for advice.

16 is age of consent in many states. Do you prefer to date females who slept with 100s of men?

wow you're assuming a lot about a lot ....

hopefully this dude isn't sub-specializing in pediatrics

[Guest]

(04-16-2021, 10:30 PM)Guest Wrote:

(04-16-2021, 09:53 PM)Guest Wrote:

(04-16-2021, 07:58 PM)Guest Wrote: Lol. I refuse to believe this is real. No way this guy both admitted to dating a 16 year old while he was in medical school and decided neurosurgeryhub.org was the best place to ask for advice.

lol.

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(04-16-2021, 09:32 PM)Guest Wrote:

(04-16-2021, 07:58 PM)Guest Wrote: Lol. I refuse to believe this is real. No way this guy both admitted to dating a 16 year old while he was in medical school and decided neurosurgeryhub.org was the best place to ask for advice.

16 is age of consent in many states. Do you prefer to date females who slept with 100s of men?

wow you're assuming a lot about a lot ....

hopefully this dude isn't sub-specializing in pediatrics

you will need him to take out the medulloblastoma in your kid

[Guest]

(04-16-2021, 10:30 PM)Guest Wrote:

(04-16-2021, 09:53 PM)Guest Wrote:

(04-16-2021, 07:58 PM)Guest Wrote: Lol. I refuse to believe this is real. No way this guy both admitted to dating a 16 year old while he was in medical school and decided neurosurgeryhub.org was the best place to ask for advice.

lol.

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(04-16-2021, 09:32 PM)Guest Wrote:

(04-16-2021, 07:58 PM)Guest Wrote: Lol. I refuse to believe this is real. No way this guy both admitted to dating a 16 year old while he was in medical school and decided neurosurgeryhub.org was the best place to ask for advice.

16 is age of consent in many states. Do you prefer to date females who slept with 100s of men?

wow you're assuming a lot about a lot ....

hopefully this dude isn't sub-specializing in pediatrics

Why are you so cruel to OP? What evil has this man done?

You will lie in the lowest circle of Hell for your cruelty. May God have mercy on your soul.

[Guest]

Seems like an IMG perhaps. Don't know their situation or what is culturally appropriate so can't judge.

Regardless, being in a relationship in and of itself is tough and is only further complicated by all the reasons above. Put as much effort as you can, but also realize that it will be a difficult road given the maturity gap. Good luck to you