Not sure what to do. Competitive applicant (265+, 35+ pubs, strong letters). Have a subI lined up at a great program. Have been infatuated with the field since undergrad.
Having second thoughts as of late. Plan on starting a family in residency. Concerned my passion for the field will wane once I start having children and will end up like many residents/attendings I've seen who seem bitter, regretful and just generally unpleasant. Have not been able to find a field in medical school that I have nearly as much passion for- doing something else would seem like just a job.
Anyone else struggled with this?
Do orthopedics. It’s way better.
If you haven't spent significant time on the neurosurgery service, wait until after your first sub-i to make any drastic moves. If you really love it, it shouldn't matter. There are plenty of academic neurosurgeons who are happy with families. You might not subspecialize in endovascular (although you definitely can and I have mentors with families who did), but most attendings are able to balance the two.
You'll also find that there's a large spectrum of residency programs as far as being family friendly. Research years are a great time to have kids. You should also look for places where residents are married, have kids, and started families. In my program, at least 1/4 residents have kids and that was important to me when I ranked it.
There are definitely programs that are more family friendly. You just have to ask about how many residents have families etc. Agree with the above poster who said do your subI first to see what you're really thinking. I had minor second thoughts going into fourth year (I think youre unusual if you look at the neurosurgery hours of the junior years and *don't* have second thoughts) but like you, I didn't love anything else quite as much.
Your residency is tough no matter where you go. But it is finite and your life afterward doesn't have to be the same. Neurosurgery is busy but with an understanding partner, a good family life is attainable. Anything requires sacrifice, so more time for family is going to affect your surgical productivity, research, admin time, hobbies, or sleep. Most of us are OK with that. Like any other career, you set your priorities and accept the consequences. I got married and had kids during residency. Now that I'm out, there are some days when I don't see them, but those are rare and I make it a point to be 100% present when I am there. My spouse makes it possible.
Ike T Lawson
Unregistered
What other programs come to mind besides BNI, Mayo, Mich,?
i know a guy who got into a pretty cush neurosurgery program and dropped out after one year and then went into ophthalmology he wanted a family life so i guess he got a family life and is happy now with lots of hours off so make sure that doesn't happen to you good luck
Family friendly is a myth, even at programs with many married residents with kids. Neurosurgery lifestyle is tough no matter where you train. The only real cushion is independent wealth from your parents or spouse. Some of the most family friendy programs coincidentally have the wealthiest residents or very low cost of living.
